July 9, 2020

What to do if You’re Trying and Can’t Get Pregnant



So, you’re trying to have a baby! Congratulations! Conceiving a little one of your own is always an exciting part of life, but sometimes, it’s harder than you think. If you and your partner have been attempting to conceive without results for a while, you might be thinking to yourself, “Am I infertile?” I’ve been here many times.

The amount of time that couples let pass before they start to worry is different for everyone. Some might grow concerned after a few months while others don’t worry until a year has passed. Here’s the truth, though: it’s totally normal to take several months to a year to conceive!

If you’re still concerned with infertility, here are a few things that can hopefully ease your mind during this uncertain time.


By definition, a woman under the age of 35 is deemed infertile after 13 months (over a year!) of trying and failing to conceive. Over 35, she will be deemed infertile after 6-months of no results. Unfortunately, the biological clock is always ticking!

It’s important to understand that infertility and sterility are not the same thing. A person who is sterile has zero chance of conceiving without professional medical help (IVF). However, there is a chance that sterile women are incapable of carrying a child altogether. But we want to learn more, so read on!


Infertility can have you thinking back into the past. Did I take birth control too long? Did I party too hard in college? Do I eat healthy enough? Is it in my genes? So many what if’s! You may never know the exact reason or you may get some small answers but overall, give yourself some grace and don’t beat yourself up over it.

In many cases, infertility in women happens when the ovaries are unable to release eggs properly. Some women show early signs of menopause, while others have something called PCOS (Polycystic ovary syndrome) which prevents the ovary from releasing eggs properly.

Still, there are many other reasons why you might not be pregnant yet that can be solved with just a little bit of research and a lot of patience.

  • Ovulation schedule – It’s important to make sure that you’re having regular sex that lines up with your ovulation schedule. Otherwise, it would be as if you’re shooting at a quickly moving target.
  • It’s not you – About one-third of couples will come to realize that it is, in fact, the man who is infertile!
  • Fallopian tubes – Endometriosis, blocked Fallopian tubes, or the way a uterus is shaped may prevent contraception from taking place.
  • Underlying medical problems – It could be something as simple as the woman’s low weight or a thyroid imbalance that is causing infertility. Both of which are easily remedied with a doctor’s assistance. It is also possibly for infertility to be caused by depression, an undiagnosed abnormality, or undiagnosed diabetes.


If you’ve been trying for over a year and you haven’t been having any luck, you should see a doctor. The longer you want to get to the root of your infertility issue, the longer it will take for you to welcome your new baby into the world!

The most important thing to do if you think you are infertile is to be kind to yourself. Find a local fertility clinic or ask your OBGYN for any advice. Taking the first step may seem daunting but it will be worth it once you start getting closer to understanding your body and what’s going on.

Finding other infertility warriors for support is huge, you can check out my personal journey on instagram! Here to help!

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